Best Talk In Town

Iris Chelarescu

#Stayathome And 2020 In A Nutshell

by

#Stayathome And 2020 In A Nutshell

And how Covid-19 changed our lives

October 13, 2021

A friend of mine asked me, “Why would you write about one of the most depressing years in history and remind your audience of something they just wanna bury?” I disagree. 

Well, #Stayathome and 2020 in a Nutshell article was born because growth comes out of darkness and hard times.

Not always, but most of the time.

2020 – The shittiest year in history brought the best and the worst out of humanity. It was a year that challenged us mentally, physically, and financially. It gave us some meaningful lessons, and it marked us forever.

Married people went crazy working from home, dealing with kids studying online.

Couples were “stuck” 24/7 with their partners, something they were not used to.

Singles got bored and depressed out of loneliness.

We dealt with an unknown virus and uncertain long-term consequences.

Remote work was another challenge and something most of us were not used to.

Waking up in the morning, working in pajamas, from our bed for 10 hours, and having nowhere to work out or socialize – everything was online.

Dating was weird. 

People lost their jobs. They couldn’t pay their loans or keep their kids in schools. So many families left Dubai last year.

None of the above was our choice, it was out of our control, and there was no other way.

A global mess.

But here is my thought: Yes, it was tough on a mental and financial level. There was suicide, loneliness, sadness, boredom, fear, uncertainty, empty pockets, pain, and no clue what the future looked like.

But what I noticed is that people that were in a good place all they did was complain and whine. We were locked in the luxury of our homes, connected to wifi, having Netflix, food, warmth, AC, access to clean water, and the possibility to go to the supermarket or order anything you could imagine online. Not to mention instant communication with our families and friends.

What would people who survived the Spanish Flu or the World Wars say?

Hmmm … Just think about it.

I was one of the 8B people living on this planet that went through this. But I consider myself one of the lucky ones.

In January 2020, I Was Sailing On An Exciting High Wave: I Had A Brand New Job, A New Apartment, More Money In My Pocket, Back To My Social Life. I Was Basically Getting Out Of My Dark Two-And-A-Half-Year Period When Things Were Shaky And Insecure For Me And Struggling Living In Dubai.

I was planning Bali for the summer and so much more. The world was again my oyster. I was 38.

February was weird, but I doubted a pandemic was really coming up. In my head, social life was moving, Bali and other exciting trips for the summer were happening.

I was again happy and full of hope, back in business.

In mid-March, we temporarily closed a business that a friend of mine and I manage.

Curfew came. Can’t remember the exact timings now, but either way, It was weird not to be able to buy a bottle of milk after 8 pm because the police would send you home or, even worse, fine you.

And I will never forget that Friday evening when we learned that from Saturday, April 4th, we were locked inside the house due to the sterilization program. For an undetermined period…
My Three Weeks Lockdown Experience 

  1. Work was at its best. And coming after a few years of shakiness in terms of career and finances, I was a bit worried. I only had the job for 4 months. But it all went well, and the workload was higher than usual. It all went digital, but there was no other option.
  2. I was non-stop connected with my friends and family via Zoom, calls, and WhatsApp.
  3. Working out. I have a big apartment, but I was not equipped with all the necessary tools. However, I managed to have pretty decent daily workouts, which made me stay in shape. After the first lockdown week, I discovered that a few neighbors were doing their cardio on the ground floor parking, which is outdoor and half covered. Obviously, I joined. Happy days.
  4. Netflix. Watched a couple of excellent series. My favorites from that time are The Sinner, Season 1 and 2, and BlackMirror.
  5. Cooking. I was trying a new dish every second day, at least.
  6. Online ordering. I am not a big fan of online orders as I prefer to do most of my shopping in person. But having everything delivered to your door was actually not that bad.
  7. Making a grocery list and going to the mall or to the supermarket was the highlight of the week. Makes me laugh now when I think about it :))
  8. I even visited one of my friends a couple of times for dinner, drinks, and movie night.

Positive 

  • Work was safe, and I was handling new clients and new projects.
  • Since I worked from the office except for the 3 weeks lockdown, I was happy to wake up in the morning, think of what I would wear about my make-up, etc. Also, shopping made sense, so I became very good friends with Shein LOL
  • I made new friends through my little socializing outings and through work.
  • I was back to rereading books after a 2 years break.
  • Started to shop up to 50% online more
  • Saved a little more money

Negative

  • Did not travel. I was afraid I would be stuck or quarantined somewhere.
  • Didn’t see my family until recently, after more than 2 years.
  • I was living my life, but honestly, I had a sense of fear deep down because it was still 2020, and you never know.
  • Felt lonelier, especially in the second part of the year, as no matter how open Dubai was, the socializing options were still limited, and restrictions were on.
  • There was too much online socializing, and I am an in-person girl. I want to hug and see my friends and meet new people. Live not through a screen.

In A Nutshell, Nobody Was Prepared For The #Stayathome Experience And For What Was Coming. But 2020 Showed Us That

  • Having some savings can … SAVE US.
  • Making a Plan B and C – never keep your eggs in the same basket is a wise idea.
  • Spending more time with yourself is better than we thought.
  • We are adapted to survive, and this is what we did.
  • We are powerful human beings, and we can overcome any obstacles.

What I appreciate about 2020 is that as though it was for most of us, it gave us hope, and it showed us again that every problem has a solution. We lost jobs, found others, broke up, met other people, and our friends moved away, but we built new friendships, and businesses collapsed. Still, others flourished, and the most beautiful thing: many people got to know that they could spend time with themselves and enjoy their own company. How magic is that!

This shows how strong our human race is and how adapted we are toward survival.

As a closing remark, I am really proud of Dubai and I am grateful I was “stuck” in this city and not somewhere else. We still had many opportunities to socialize and entertain ourselves. Dubai kept us warm and safe. Thank-you UAE!

How was your lockdown experience, and how was 2020 overall?

Can I Find Love In Dubai?

by

Can I Find Love In Dubai?

A sad reality or we just like to find excuses?

October 10, 2021

The number of times that I heard love can’t be found in Dubai is countless. In fact, I am bored of hearing this.

I didn’t find it. Yet. But Dubai has 3.4M inhabitants, and I am only one of them, so I am not the perfect example (maybe because of my bad choices or what life had in store for me so far).

Apart from hearing that “you can’t find love in Dubai,” I was also ironically told, “What do you think you will find Prince Charming here???”. I don’t even believe in a Prince coming to my building in Barsha in a white Porsche.  Or who knows … 😛

More ironically is that I heard this from married and coupled individuals … that most of them found each other right in this city.

So if there is no love whatsoever in Dubai, like they say, what should we do? Move away? I would like to know that country or city where all men are hot and available at any time because you know me by now: I will buy a one-way ticket and move today :)))

Talking about other places, Romania is mediocre in dating, and Germany is a complete disaster. Now Dubai is a shallow place where everyone is looking just for entertainment. So other locations must be better??

Here are two main reasons I keep hearing from ex-pats – why they think it is difficult to have a serious relationship and even get married in the UAE.

  1. Dubai is a station where people are temporary passengers 

My Reply – Like any other place such as Singapore, Hong Kong, or New York, Dubai has a lot of expats. In fact, here, things are a little different as there are more expats than locals (90% foreigners and 10% locals).

Most of us who move here (I am not in this category as I always said I will stay here for a long time) thinking it will be a short journey. However, we wake up one morning, and it’s been a decade long or even more. Many other nationalities, such as Arabs from the Levant, are even born and raised here.

We make a lot of friends, get stable jobs and even buy a house. Not to mention that the entertainment here is for all tastes: families, youngsters, bachelors, etc

So Dubai might be a station, but it is a very long one where guess what, people meet, date, get engaged, have relationships, and get married. Many of my friends and other people that I know met in Dubai. They fell in love here and got married. Some moved away, some stayed. But Dubai is what hooked them up.

Therefore so many of us come here and have a family, buy a house, make a lot of friends and find a partner.

So I am totally so not convinced with this point.

Only one aspect `I agree upon – UAE is not a place where you can stay forever because if you are above 60, let’s say and you don”t have a job and a visa or a family to pay for these expenses, it is very clear that you have to leave.

Nevertheless, this has nothing to do with finding love here.

  1. People in Dubai are not reliable, and they just want to have fun 

Men and even women are not serious in Dubai; they just want to party and have fun without commitment.

My Reply – If you go to any other place in this world, everyone is keen to get married and have serious relationships? Again, tell me where that place is, and I will relocate. Sounds very appealing.  LOL

Everybody wants to have fun, but we all settle down eventually, no matter where we are. Ok, DXB is an open city with plenty of entertainment options from brunches, ladies’ nights to yacht parties, private parties, and so much more.

And here is how it works: most of us, when moving here, go a little crazy and jump from one party to another. We have sleepless nights and date a lot of people without looking for a serious commitment. Nothing wrong with that, especially if you are single. It’s the Dubai mirage. But how much can you go on like this?. Trust me. It might take 2-3-4-5 years depending on each. Also depends on your age and what you want to accomplish in this city. But trust me, sooner or later, you will want to settle.

When I moved, I was going out 5 times/week in the first 3 years here. And slowly, I started to cool down. I still go out but definitely less because my priorities changed. I am also fed up with sleeping at 3-4-5 am and going to work the next morning.

By the way, another thing I constantly keep hearing is, “married people cheat more here,” and my question is: do married people only cheat in Dubai?? 

Check out this article and we can meet after for a cup of coffee and talk 😉

The above link is just an example as the internet is flooded with similar stats and facts on the topic and I didn’t really see Dubai on those lists.

If I relate to my home country for example – Romania – I bet that the adultery rate is more than 50% higher than the UAE.

Anyway, all the above are only and exclusively excuses. If Dubai is so cursed, how come so many people find love here? I didn’t, and I could be one of the naggers and say this. But I won’t because I know it’s not true.

Love just as much as hate is everywhere, from Hawaii to Rome and from Dubai to Singapore.

Globally speaking, dating and relationships are a mess because of the world we live in, the “new normal”, the destructive way we use access to information and social media because we don’t have patience and want everything NOW and FAST. Because there is no more Quality but mainly Quantity which leads to … Superficiality. 

So Dubai inhabitants, locals, or foreigners, when you say I can’t find Love in Dubai, think of how humanity changed in the last 20-30-40 years. And obviously the impact those changes had on dating and relationships.

As a closing note if you live here and you are so unhappy that there is no “love” available on the market, why don’t you move and look for it somewhere else?

My advice is: don’t chase love – wherever you are, love will always find you at the right time at the right place and this place can be anywhere in this whole wide world even Dubai.

Did you find love in Dubai?

Why Women Need To Be Financially Independent

by

Why Women Need To Be Financially Independent

A man is not your financial plan – Kim Kiyosaki.

September 27, 2021

My dirty secret little thought after having a shitty week at work is that I wanna be a housewife and live at my man’s expense. Yeah, I admit it. A husband that pays the bills looks so tempting and worry-free sometimes. And as a matter of fact, women are built for that, and we could easily be housewives and dedicate our lives by successfully running a household.

Nothing wrong with that. I want to be a wife and mother someday and have my own family.

Nevertheless, I will always make my own money and be a financially independent woman. I don’t care if it is less than what he makes, but I will have my income whether I work part-time or full-time or manage a small business.

I know so many women depend on their partners. It can be ok, but how safe do you feel at the end of the day? How can you sleep at night?


Shit Can Hit The Fan At Any Given Time 

  • He can lose his job 
  • His business can be bankrupt 
  • He can have an accident and not be able to work for a long time 
  • He can die … sorry, but it’s an option 
  • He can turn into a nasty bitch and leave you for whatever reason … most of the time is for another (younger) woman 

Just Have A Holy Plan B 

  • Have a job. You don’t have to be head of your department or run a division of a multinational company. Still, you can have a decent place to work with flexible hours.
  • Find your passion and run a small business. If your yearly revenue it’s not 1M per year, it’s ok as long as there is some money getting into your pocket every month. 
  • Have your own savings. Wink. I think in a couple there should be no secrets and full transparent communication. But If something really bad happens, your well-kept savings will turn into family savings. And he will thank you for that. Another thing that you could do is invest in yourself and polish some skills by enrolling in an MBA or any other class that might be interesting for you.

Perks Of Being Active And Financially Independent 

  • Have your own money that you don’t have to ask for when you go to the salon. Asking for a few bucks every time you need to go to your many and pedi can become exhausting and embarrassing, 
  • You will be in an environment and busy with other people so when he gets home, you can talk about other things rather than how peeled the potatoes for dinner or how the delivery from Amazon was late again.
  • You’ll have your own retirement plan and other benefits. 
  • Keep your brain in continuous motion. 
  • It’s great to have your own family. I want one. But don’t forget about what you love and don’t lose your identity.
  • Be up to date with trends regarding your industry and spend less time on social media and checking what other people do.

Now I know you might come and say, My husband is so rich I have nothing to worry about for the rest of my life and in this case, I would say, Yes, but your husband could be bankrupt tomorrow.

Agree?

Women Who Empower One Another

by

Women Who Empower One Another

Let’s get rid of that toxic competition and burry our insecurities

September 22, 2021

There is a lot of ugliness in this world, and us women not sticking for each other does not make things any prettier. I find it not sexy to look at another one with envy just because her shoes are more expensive than yours. Still, your income is three times higher than hers, or maybe you don’t work hard enough like her to afford it. Performing in a toxic environment and knowing how to have shitty girlfriends is not unfamiliar to me. With the last ones, it’s very easy to step back – Bye, Felicia.

However, when you work in a company culture that sucks, you have to take it because you need that paycheck at the end of the month, right? Or perhaps you love your job, but other “lovely” creatures are just ruining it for you.

I would love to see less envy, bitchyness, and more understanding and empathy. Sounds like La La Land, but I know it is possible.
I don’t deny competition as long as it is challenging and fair. Call me naive, but this is me.

I feel #blessed and #fortunate to be surrounded by a tribe of amazing women that I call close friends in my personal life.

I am there for them with the best that I can do, just as they are for me, from listening to holding hands during unhappy times to being there in the happiest moments in their lives. It’s healthy to have your squad and to treat the women around you right.

Together we are much stronger, much better, and we simply shine.  When it comes to a career, the game changes completely and is more painful as you have to eat the dirt from your frustrated lady boss or maybe your lady co-workers
… 9 hours every day from Sunday to Thursday, 5 days per week, 12 months per year. Yikes!

From what I have seen and been through myself when women get together – most of the time – shit hits the fan because at least one of them has to ruin it. Just because she can and because no one hugged her in her childhood years.

Nevertheless, I want to focus a little more on “toxicity” between women in the work field, and I wanted to share a short story with you.
In 2017 I joined a prestigious hospitality company based in Dubai DIFC. I had the “pleasure” to be working in a viper’s nest, and I felt the viciousness to my core. Never been surrounded by so many snakes in my life. To be fair, not all girls were like that, “only” 80%, so most of them (thank you, M. for you being one of the few nice ones there). As a matter of fact, the whole place was populated with these specimens. Not let’s help each other but let’s stab each other. Damn was such a painful experience. To understand better, at the end of the working day, I was afraid to take the elevator, and I was running on the emergency stairs. I cried in the street a few times. They humiliated me for no reason, accused me of things I didn’t do, and they trashed me because I was good.

Instead of supporting or empowering each other, it was quite the opposite in my team. Let’s break the team, make it bleed, yay!
That was probably one of the most toxic environments I ever worked in. The whole crap around it was mainly because of the women working there.

Luckily this job only lasted for three months.

But of course, I dealt with nastiness in many other jobs and other contexts such as interviews, gatherings, events, etc.

If women would stick together and be less individualistic and more confident, trust me, we would move mountains.
But instead, they choose to be led by their insecurities, jealousy, and gossip.

Oftentimes women talk about how poorly they are treated by men, but how about women at work that all they do is bully and look at other women with envy and jealousy like they are a potential enemy.
Not to mention the ones desperate to be the center of attention no matter what.

My question is: If you celebrate and support another women’s success, does that make you feel weak? Probably for some, the answer is yes.

I think it’s a shame to treat other women like this; it is a shame to treat both genders, but women between each other are even worse.
It’s time to make a change and support each other.

2. Realistically, not everyone can just quit. We have obligations, loans, kids in school, and so on. However, seriously start considering Point 1

3. While you are still there

  • Stay away from gossip. 
  • See who your real friends are – if any. 
  • Smile and be in a good mood, basically kill them with kindness.
  • If they attack you, but you have a point, and you know you are 100% right, stand up for yourself. Like this, you will show you don’t let them step on you.
  • Try to do your job the best possible way. 
  • Don’t stay in a corner alone – just pretend like I don’t give a f*** in a nice possible way. 

To the bullies, I can only say this: relax, have some wine, get laid, go out and try some therapy and reflect on how you treat your own kind.

Have you experienced any trauma caused by other women, especially at work? 

Buy That Ticket. Really.

by

Buy That Ticket. Really.

You will thank yourself later. Period.

September 1, 2021

Buy that ticket. At least once in a lifetime. Leave everything behind and start from zero. Crazy, right? Can you do it? Oh Yes! Are you afraid? Good  🙂

I did it twice. And I am not trying to show I am better than anyone else who didn’t, or wow, I am so cool and crazy. But now that I look back, I love what I did, and I encourage you to try.
None of those times had a specific plan in my head, but I knew I had to.2010 – It’s when it all started. Out of the blue, I decided to end 29 cozy years of life in Romania, packed 2 suitcases, and swore to never go back. Ok, I go back every year to see my family and friends. But what’s done is done, and there is no turning back.
Just to highlight – I will never deny my roots and beginnings as I am who I am today (and I am grateful!) because of where I grew up and because of what my parents taught me. 100%. But being connected to my natal land was not an option anymore at some point in my life. There was so much more to explore out there. And If I can, you can do it too, no doubt about it.

On September 6, 2010, I landed in Berlin, Germany. I didn’t know anyone.
It was hell: the first 12 months, I was depressed, angry, and confused, and I had enormous difficulties adapting to a very different culture than mine as German people are colder and coyer. My job saved me as it was very exciting and I’ve met some people because I was dancing salsa and my job was connected to that.
It was also my first time living in shared accommodation.

First time to be kicked out after 3 months with 2 days’ notice because I refused to pay for increased ridiculous rent.
It was the first time I learned how to use a washing machine (I was 29!!!), change my bedsheets, and pay bills. You can laugh. I am, and I thought it was a big deal at that time … at 29, I was finally growing up.
After being thrown out from the first apartment, I slept for 2 months on the couch of a girl that I met at the salsa studio.
Fell in love with one of my salsa students who had a girlfriend but promised me the world. He dumped me after a few months, and I couldn’t leave the bed for 3 days.
Shortly after, I moved and shared a lovely apartment in an “altbau” (old building dating from the first WW period) in West Berlin with a super nice Russian girl. Unfortunately, after 2 years, she told me she wanted to live alone, but luckily I found my own amazing place where I stayed for another 2 years before the next big move.

In 2013 due to the fantastic job in Germany, I traveled with my wonderful boss, who is still one of my best friends, to Abu Dhabi. One of those days, we visited Dubai for a couple of hours.
We didn’t have time to see much: we went to Palm Jumeirah, Burj Khalifa, Souk Madinat for lunch and a bit of shopping in Dubai Mall.

I was mesmerized by the beauty of this city, the magnitude, and its sparkle.

Coming back to Germany, there was already a seed planted in my brain that slowly but surely brought me where I am today. Initially, my mind only found obstacles. I was thinking, “What could I ever possibly do in Dubai”? “How could I find a job there”? “Who would ever hire me”? – like, omg, our mind can be our best friend or enemy at the same time. Another year passed, and I didn’t think about it much, even though Dubai was still in my heart.

At the same time, even though I was traveling a lot due to my job, it was difficult to bear if I was more than 2 weeks in Berlin. With all the nice friends I had, I was bored to death. That place where I imagined staying forever and building a life well, I was releasing more and more that was never my cup of tea.

In May 2014, I traveled back to the UAE, and my boss and I booked a whole week.
4 nights were allocated to Dubai and 3 to Fujairah to promote our work at a salsa festival there.

In a few words, I had the time of my life. Due to my salsa job and global community that I was already in for around 6 years, I already knew some people and met more while I was there, and the time spent, especially in Dubai, was unforgettable.
When I had to leave, I had tears in my eyes.
The truth is, and I will not talk much about it, I also met someone that twisted my mind.

So we started some sort of long-distance dating. I went back to Berlin, and he was in Dubai. I came back 2 times to see him, and whenever I had to leave Dubai, my heart was broken. In August 2014, we also broke up.
And right after it clicked – I was like ok – This is it – I am moving to Dubai anyway. Not for him, BUT for me.

A marathon of finding a job started for the next 3 months. Nothing worked, and no calls back, only several written rejections and plenty of unanswered emails.
In Nov 2014, I said to myself, If I don’t buy that ticket, I will end up in a place that makes me feel miserable, and time will just fly. I was 33.
That was the second time that I confidently bought the second one-way ticket. And I didn’t think about it much, and I just knew Berlin it’s a closed chapter for me and that Dubai is a new one that waits for me to start fresh.

I had no idea what I would do, but all that was going through my mind – “I have some savings, I will sell my furniture, and I will figure it out.”
My ticket was for April 18, 2015, and perhaps the Universe has a way of settling things because, in January 2015, I found a job and a place to stay. By the way, that job that I had for 8 months was the worst ever. I am laughing when I think about it now, but I was crying and being in physical and mental pain at that time.

And here I am, living in Dubai for the last 6 years+. I got to know this country to its core. I have been through hell and heaven. But I am still here, and I love love love it.
And just for the record, wherever you live, it will always be plus and minus, no matter what. Dubai is not perfect, but it’s special and so unique.

I have just reached my 40s now, and I sometimes wonder If I could buy another one-way ticket. My brain says no, and I would not start again from zero and go through all that hassle again, plus Dubai is literally “home away from home.” But you never know …

My Advice For You
Don’t Overthink. Once You Feel That You Have To Move, Just Buy That Ticket. Really.
And If you don’t feel it or are in doubt, there will be a right moment if it is meant for you to do it.
I guess doing what I did was my own personal way of conquering my fears and pushing me to the limit. And I am proud of it.

If you do it, is it going to be hard? Hell yeah! Especially if you will be on your own. Will you survive? Oh yeah! Worst-case scenario, you can still go back home, but for me personally, this was never an option.
Will you test your limits and grow as an individual? A lot, you have no idea.

Have you ever bought a one-way ticket and thrown yourself out there?

For The Love Of Men

by

For The Love Of Men

I am a strong, confident woman and I need men

August 18, 2021

Successful women still “need” men. Our existence would not be the same without them, just like theirs without us.

It’s simple math, and there’s no room for ego here: they need us, + we need them = this is how life should flow.

I love them, I need them, and I honor and cherish them. And I couldn’t imagine my existence without men.

Supposedly you have read some of my articles already. In that case, I guess you figured by now that this is a blog where I speak to women about women. I discuss our issues and concerns, but I am 100% supporting men. And nowadays we need all of us to put double the efforts into working on our relationships because of the world we live in. 

I personally don’t appreciate the feminine voices that throw stones into men and say they are all the same – which is crap.

Yes, they can be, and there are plenty of assholes. But aren’t many of us bitches too?

Since we were born, men have played many vital roles in our lives, from father figures, brothers, bosses, male friends, and life partners. 

One of the reasons many women have such hate for them and put them all in the same pot is because of the trauma men caused them. Fair enough. But did they all do that? Did we only have to deal in our past only with the bad ones? I don’t think so.

I grew up with a possessive and aggressive father that abused me physically and mentally. He constantly repeated that I would never do anything with my life and that all I am is a piece of shit. Can’t blame him. His parents raised him like that, and he did what he thought was right. 

But on the flip side, he was a brilliant, educated, charismatic man that gave me an excellent education and made me who I am today. Our relationship improved when I stood up for myself at 16 years old and even better after leaving Romania at 29 years old. We actually became very good friends until he passed away in 2016.

He was the first man in my life.

The second man was my first boyfriend, the complete Psycho that also abused me verbally, emotionally, and physically from 19 until 27. But he gave me experience, and he also had a massive role in shaping the woman I am now.

So If you look at it, for the first 27 years of my life, I was in constant abuse by … men.

That’s a pretty long time, and when I go back in time and remember, it was not fun.

In the following years, I dealt with other shitty male figures, whether they were part of my professional (my first boss in Dubai) or personal life.

Despite all the above, and `I underline this – I had a lot of male figures in my life that made me shine bright like a F****** diamond.

From incredible caring partners, friends, family members to work colleagues, bosses, mentors, and teachers. 

I have so many examples of men that loved me, stood up for me, cheered for me, spent their time teaching me valuable lessons, respected and empowered me. 

Some helped me in tremendous ways without asking or expecting anything in return. And I am forever grateful for that. 

Clearly, I would not be where I am today without any of the men in my life. Both the ones that abused the ones that took care of me and loved me and me. 

To be honest, I think they all loved me, but some had their own sick ways of showing it. Because that’s all, they knew.

And I am ok with it. I made peace with them, with what they did, and with the past.
The Smartest Thing A Woman Can Do Is Need Men.

To clarify the title and the whole article, If I need a man, this doesn’t mean I am handicapped, or perhaps it’s a sign of weakness. Not at all. It means I am a woman, and I need male energy in my life. I am honestly not interested or have any pleasure in changing the safety switch nor dealing with the building administrator, or calling the plumber. 

Yes, yes, Yes If I have to, I will, and I can. But I don’t want to. I chose not to.

Men are not monsters but human beings who make mistakes and try to figure things out just like women. And the only way to have better relationships is to be kinder, listen and understand them more instead of always putting the same labels. 

I assume we all have different needs and expect other things from men. I need to feel safe and protected, and I need a man to hug me, to tell me that everything will be ok and that he is there for me no matter what. While I have a career, I can pay for my flight to the Bahamas or buy an expensive pair of shoes.

I need and want this in my life. It is healthy, and it makes me happy. And this is love. 

Whatever your needs may be, there is profound power in honoring them, all of them.

Do you need men in your life?